Never Accuse the Alcoholic of Being an Alcoholic |
Never Accuse the Alcoholic of Being an Alcoholic
If you live with someone that drinks, the last thing you should do is accuse him or her of being an alcoholic. Not only will you lose the debate, but they will become upset and in some cases, verbally, physically or mentally abusive. An alcoholic has to be the one to admit that they have a problem and there is no one else that can tell them any different. They will not listen to you no matter what you say. You might mention that the drinking is getting out of hand, but they may not think that there is a problem.
A never-ending fight is all you will have. If you accuse the alcoholic of drinking too much, they will defend themselves to no avail. They will insist that it is you that has problems and whatever else they can think of to say. You will never win the battle in this case. If you live with an alcoholic, you will need a support group such an Al-Anon to help you. You need to talk with others that are going through the same thing as you. The problems will not go away until the alcoholic decides that they have a problem.
They can make you believe that they have not been drinking and they even believe it. This is common when you live with an alcoholic. They can hide their drinking because you accuse them of drinking. Then when you accuse them of drinking or you find the empties, they will tell you that those are from months ago, even though you know better. The horrible truth is that the alcoholic believes what he or she is saying to you and can sound so convincing. This is how they make you doubt yourself.
You will only start an argument if you continue to accuse him or her of being an alcoholic. This is a problem for anyone that lives with an alcoholic. You want to make them see what they are doing, but all you will succeed in doing is making them defensive and lie more. When the person is not drinking, you could mention the problem, but chances are they are going to deny any wrong doings. They can be very secretive and deceitful when it comes to drinking. They will do anything to drink and you will not stop them.
They will not want to hear what you have to say even when they are sober. An alcoholic that thinks that they do not have a problem may not listen to you even when they are sober. They are sober so how could they have a problem. They can make you feel as if you are imaging a problem or even looking for reasons to start a fight. You will never win. However, you cannot let this fool you. You know there is a problem and you have to keep on top of everything.
There will come a day, when they will do something that will make them think about there drinking. Unfortunately, they will only be good for a short time. If they break something or hurt you, they will be sorry and make promises. Unfortunately, this is only a short-term fix. They are not going to stop drinking. They may slow down for a while until the urge takes over a gain. Then it will be back to the same thing all over again until the next time.
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